Same here. My mom was angry more often than not. She didn't talk much but she did get mad and raise her voice frequently. Said mean shit, put people down, just generally was a very unpleasant person and all you could do was stay away because otherwise she was going to make you feel bad. It was never clear what would set her off, she was just prone to rage or something, or felt like it was OK to take out her anger on whoever she could. I spent my teen years avoiding her as much as I could, avoiding talking to her so she wouldn't give me shit about how bad I looked or whatever snarky bullshit she would direct at me about the things I was into. She never hit me or anything like that, she just tried to make me feel like I was ugly, a disappointment, etc. I was really struggling with severe depression and all she ever did was make it worse. She never even noticed I was depressed even though my symptoms were extremely obvious. I moved out as soon as I could and our relationship improved, she stopped being mean to me, stopped talking shit about me (to my face), and for many years we got along fairly well when I called her on the phone or came to visit her. She never really put in any effort, but I tried for many years. Then some shit went on in my life that left me extremely depressed for the first time in years and she showed her true colors again, and now she is no longer a part of my life. No one gets to yell at me or put me down, try to make me feel like shit. That's not family. I haven't seen or talked to my mother in nearly a decade.

OP - please sort your wife out so you don't end up with a child driven from your family like I was. Get her into therapy to deal with her behaviors now while you still can.